So, as soon as I got out of the house, I lived on a steady diet of horror movies and strange magazines. The combination of natural proclivity toward odd, camp and trash, combined with a steady diet of the literary, has made my tastes rather odd.
After years of spending my hard earned cash on such pleasures, I was horrified to find that my favorite magazines were becoming more and more difficult to find.
Imagine my pleasure when I discovered Cracked is not only alive and well, but living on the 'net! And snarky as ever.
To celebrate this discovery, here is Cracked's version of the Twilight screenplay - ten times shorter, and 100 times more honest.